Could you forgive your child’s killer?

Betsy Shaw

posted in Mom Stories

Trayvon Martin’s parents were unimpressed, insulted even, by George Zimmerman’s recent public apology.

After watching Zimmerman’s interview with Sean Hannity over on the N.Y. Times Lede Bog, I can understand why.

First of all, the medium for the apology, a TV talk show interview orchestrated by a savvy talk show host and involving a man who is awaiting prosecution for the high-profile shooting death of an unarmed 17-year old boy pretty much guarantees a certain amount of contrived dialogue and pretension.

In the beginning of the interview with Sean Hannity for Fox News, Zimmerman made a rambling attempt at apology to the Trayvon’s parents, part of which included this curious phrase:

“I”m sorry that they buried their child, I cannot imagine what it must feel like, and I pray for them daily.”

It also didn’t help that when the “apology moment” was over, Zimmerman was asked if he had any regrets about what happened the day he killed Martin in alleged self defense. Zimmerman professed to no regrets, even going so far as to invoke God as somehow being involved:

“I feel that it was all god’s plan and for me to second guess it, and judge it…”

The apology was, in my mind, yet another in a long line of recent non-apologies to the tune of, “I’m sorry, but I’m not taking full responsibility for this.”

In a separate interview on Fox and Friends, Sybrina Fulton, Trayvon Martin’s mother, said she found the apology “insincere and not coming from his heart.”

“He was just saying anything he wanted,” she said. “Why would God have him to kill an unarmed teenager? That just makes no sense.”

Martin’s father had a similar opinion:

Mr. Martin said that Mr. Zimmerman had ample time to apologize to them before his arrest. “By trying to publicly apologize now, he is just trying to save face,” Mr. Martin said.

At the end of the interview with Martin’s parents, the host asked them if they could ever find it in their hearts to forgive Zimmerman. Here’s what they each had to say:

Sabrina Martin: “My son just was murdered a couple of months ago, it’s not something I can stomach right now, maybe in a few years,I don’t konw, but it’s just really diff wright now to actually face and sit in the same room as somebody who’s murdered our son.”

Tracy Martin: “I think it’s too much to ask to forgive a guy that don’t even regret taking our sons life. Just to ask us to forgive George Zimmerman is just too much.”

Forgiveness and the desire for revenge is a loaded and complicated topic. And forgiving someone for taking your child’s life, and ruining many, many lives at the same time, is more complicated still. Some might say it’s impossible. I’m not sure I could do it.

Could you find it in your heart to forgive a person who was responsible for the death of your child?

If you have the time, this podcast of On Being’s discussion about the human capacity for forgiveness is fascinating and eye opening.

Photo: PR Photos

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